6 responses to “Those Fake Doms”

  1. Liz

    It seems to me that any subculture that supports a theme of induvidiality or a drastic seperatiom from the cultural norm tends to get bogged down in the debate of “real” vs. “fake”.

    I think it stems from insecurity of those involved, needing validation and to be “normal” in their “abnormality”. Thus the institution of labels and insuler behavor.

    I appreciate your site and your effort to be inclusive of all who are exploring their sexuality and what’s right for them. I will admit that I have some hesitance about joining the conversation on BDSM centric websites to avoid being told I am a fake or not really *whatever label I apply to myself* and that would really suck.
    Anyway, thank you for this post (and many others)

  2. Ally

    I stumbled upon your website today and have been extensively researching Dominance. You see, my boyfriend and I have recently taken to the BDSM Lifestyle and so far, he has been the Dom, which I absolutely love. I’m a true Submissive at heart. However, I find myself being bratty at times and its because I’m hard-willed and stubborn. My boyfriend has explained to me countless times that he wants me to be the Dom, and I really think I have it in me to be his Mistress, as he wants, but I find it increasingly difficult to put myself into the mindset of a Dominant. I’m not sure how to set up a scene, let alone have complete control over the situation. I’ve looked into a few other websites that told me to start slowly and just introduce small things at first such as making him clean something or having him kiss and massage my feet. But even so, I find it hard to order someone around. Perhaps you could give me a few pointers? It would be greatly appreciated.

  3. Kelly

    A fake to me is someone who would never do things IRL even if unattached. Many fake doms are online only seeking pictures, naked poses and videos. They don’t ever want to meet, just Skype or play on kik. These are people I knew were single and living with their parents.

  4. Jane

    Fake Doms pretend to have experience they don’t have and promise things they don’t deliver. On fetlife, I’ve met a few who pretended to be my dom, and then said they weren’t my dom. I was too inexperienced to know the difference and was hurt by that.

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