This post was written by a guest contributor. Please see their details in the post above. Guest Authors are vital to Dominant Guide in providing varying viewpoints and different perspectives. If you'd like to guest post for Dominant Guide check out our Write for Us page for details about how YOU can share your tips with our community.

2 responses to “Eight Techniques for Maintaining Communication and Trust During a Scene”

  1. Morgan

    Excellent stuff! I use most of these, especially when playing with partners who are new to me. “Wait signals” is something I haven’t heard of before and I think would be really useful. With partners I know well, I’ve been able to determine them for myself, but it hadn’t occurred to me to set them up ahead of time. Great idea!

    Thanks for another wonderful post Chris.


  2. Emma

    Lots of good suggestions here.

    Just wanted to add that an additional benefit of ‘countdown’ type scenes, particularly those where the bottom has been asked to count out the strokes, and/or thank their top for each one, is that the top can glean a good idea of how the bottom is doing based of this verbal response. For example a ‘One, thank you Sir’ which comes instantly and sounds clear demonstrates the bottom is still in a very grounded place, further into the scene it is common for the bottom to vocally respond to the impact before following up with the actual ‘Twelve, thank you Sir’ for example. When playing like this I will not proceed to the next impact until I have received the thanks for the last, essentially allowing the bottom to use this as a verbal wait signal. The way they sound when they count out the stroke will help me judge how much pain they are in and how spaced they are, and I can adjust my play accordingly.

    Thank you for the very thorough post

Leave a Reply